What? A Job?

I got one of those! Woo! Starting on the 12th of April! WIN!

This makes me especially happy because it lets me have Easter Monday off, so I'll actually be able to hang out with The Boyfriend, who will be coming down for the ANIMAL CRUELTY CELEBRATION.

Why do I call it that? Mostly because we'll be eating foie gras and raw oysters. Personally, I don't think oysters count as animals, but bajillions of taxonomists and biologists disagree with me. Still, what oysters really are, are delicious.

Does that comma look right to you? Grammatically it's correct... but it never looks right to me. Grammatically speaking that ellipsis I just used is also crap, but then again I never claimed to be an English Major.

...wait.

ANYway. Additional Good News is that I saw my cousin's production of RENT down in Charlottesville, VA the other day. Great cast, great voices for everyone. Frankly I have no idea when my cousin developed a singing voice. Apparently he's been doing stuff like this for a long time and I'm just a really terrible family member for not noticing. That's probably accurate.

None of this has anything to do with wine or other bits of alcoholism. That's because I drank so unwisely that I do not properly remember anything I drank over that weekend. I am a moron. Still, I was introduced to a lovely wine bar called Siips (oh yeah, two "i's" is how you know it's good) in the pedestrian zone of C-ville where I had a really great glass of... something. It was French and expensive and tasted like smoke and seaweed. Heavenly. Too bad I don't remember a dang thing about the name, thus making this wine journal thing pretty useless.

Nerd Weekend!

Hooray for nerd weekend!

Last night I met up with BeerSnob, Kaiser TNT and MetalChef to run a tabletop roleplaying game. It was based on the Fate system, which is really great for pick-up games, one-shots, and intense roleplaying. It is super flexible, and because a large portion of character creation is based around putting together shared backstories, it makes jumping into the game really easy. It's wonderful.

My homebrew setting (featuring the Matu'Ashak) was complemented by a tray of brownies and a bottle of Westport River Chardonnay that MetalChef gave me for my birthday/christmas/thing. It was an estate grown wine from Southeastern New England, and it was really, REALLY tasty. Very balanced acids and sugars, citrusy without tasting like juice. It was easy to drink and highly enjoyable, even out of Red Cups while pretending to be monsters. I highly recommend this wine if you get the chance to try it, it's the style of white wine that got me interested in whites in the first place.

Embarassing Pictures of People I Love

Along the path to liver destruction, I have met many wonderful people and said many stupid things. I have also taken many a blackmail picture, and have many a blackmail picture taken of me.

The weekend before last was Birthday Ball, as I'd mentioned before. I showed up as the creepy alumnus, you know, like you do. It was interesting how my photography progressed. Observe.

 

Captain Class and Cashew 

This was early in the day, right after my first sip of Mojito inna jug. I do not recommend Mojito inna jug. Make your own damn drinks, folks. Still, if you like Gatorade and getting drunk, I suppose it would work.

After that, some tequila shots, and a few jars of champagne (couldn't find flutes) My pictures started coming out like this:

                                             

Ghost-deco Princess of Scones

Everyone did look lovely that night, and apparently I had a moment of swearing inanely at a camera. And by a moment I mean three full minutes. My god I had a hate in me that night. A hate and a lot of drink. College is bad for you.

Anyway, the rest of these pictures are going up on facebook as soon as I can manage it. I have a *lot* of pictures on this camera, especially since I haven't uploaded anything since Smarmy of One and Hootie McBoob got married. My word.

Sleep Madness

So I woke up a little early this morning, and the first thing that crossed my mind was about the Avatar movie. Now, I freakin' loved that movie, but that does not excuse that level of geekery. It has completely taken over my morning.

I think that if I were the mining corporation and had access to all that nifty space stuff and a bunch of locals were causing me untold amounts of trouble... I would leave as promised and come back thirteen years later with an orbital weapon.

Hell, you wouldn't even need to leave. Grab a sufficiently dense piece of rock and drop it from low orbit and watch your strip mining operation get a whole lot easier! (though I guess that would depend on whether or not your metal would "splash" when you crater'd the site) Now, since Pandora orbits a gas giant, it's pretty likely that there's some kind of debris ring as well, which would make it especially perfect for Evil Mining Company to homebrew a Tunguska (or Vredefort, Chesapeake Bay, Popigai... choose your own impact event), since the debris could even supply plausible deniability for the perverse whims of corporate profits!

You know, Stark, I don't think Science works the way you think it works.

All I know for sure is that I have spent WAY too much time on Wikipedia.

MY POKEMANS

This morning I completed the majority of the work for my application to the University of Maryland school of social work. I celebrated by engaging in my favorite leisure activity: drinking wine and playing pokemon on my sister's game boy.

Oh yeah. I'm classy.

So while I was levelling up my Monferno (ladies) I chose a glass of Terra Barossa Shiraz, partially because I think "shiraz" sounds like a pokemon name, but mostly because it's the bottle that was open. A quick googleing tells me that this brand is part of the Thorn-Clarke winery, which has a really great website. Unfortunately, I'm not tasting any of the chocolate that they mentioned... though there's a hint of it on the aftertaste. This is probably my own fault. First, the bottle was opened two days ago and was left on a part of the counter that gets a good deal of sun. Not ideal. Secondly, I drank some coffee just before tasting it, and so my taste buds are overloaded.

 Normally I'd also list having a cold there, but for some reason, this cold is not touching the usual nose and throat membranes and has gone straight for my inner ear. It's not that bad right now, but every so often I'll look up and the room will come unhinged. Saturday was miserable. We were supposed to go skiing up at Whitetail, but I was having trouble performing such complex tasks as brushing my teeth. Throwing myself off of a mountain seemed to be a bad decision.

I have noticed that I'm not doing so well on the slopes this year. It's been about three years since my last lesson, and I can feel old bad habits kicking in. I'm throwing my heels around to make turns instead of just shifting my weight. Not only is that a waste of energy, it's a pretty useless method of speed control. So, since my efforts are less effective, I'm becoming more timid. So basically I neeed to take another lesson or two.

Hooray! I love skiing! I went with dad right after Christmas, and I'm really excited to get back on a mountain. Of course, I'm supposed to be doing things like "applying for graduate school" and "looking for a job" instead of playing on the slopes... but all work and no play makes Stark a dull girl, right?

Okay now it's time to go battle the leader of Veilistone gym!

Oh hey.

Oh hey look, I won the nano thing.

Tonight I am actually going to finish the book. Then I will regale you all with tales of thanksgiving drunkenness, complete with embarrassing pictures of my friends.

But for now? There is only Rising Mind, because god damn it I need to write the last few scenes. I  hate action scenes. I hate them a lot. I am bad at them. VERY bad at them. Also, I have realized that I change my main character's appearance from one paragraph to the next in the second chapter. I'm AWESOME.

Okay, hush now, it's time to apply to graduate school. Edit in January.

Oh god why am I not updating anymore

...Blame NaNoWriMo. I'm nearly 35 thousand words in and holy balls I just can't stop writing. Any time I sit at my computer I'm probably typing Rising Mind, and not these blog posts. I'll definitely return to this in December, when I have the chance to think about something other than crazy people and graduate school.

But here is a catch-up post. Let's talk about my last excursion to Max's Tap House with BeerSnob and The Irish.

BeerSnob is snobbish about beer, and has a hard on for stouts of all varieties. I like pilsners, because they are refreshing and pleasant and do all the things a beer should do, i.e., get you drunk but not make you sick. Irish will drink anything you put in front of him because he is poor.

I started out with the Reider Maerzen. Nobody pronounces the umlaut correctly, you linguistically uncultured bastards. Either way, I'd ordered the pilsner, but the bartender misunderstood me. Still, this was everything I want in a beer. It was light enough that I could drink it without feeling overfull, and it had a clean, malty flavor that consistently made me want more.

Irish got the house beer that night, which was a kind of gross Belgian blonde. It had the kind of fruity sweetness that I enjoy in wine, but is totally out of place in a beer. I don't know what was going on there. Very sad.

BeerSnob bought snobby beer: the Brewdog Zeitgeist dark lager, to be specific. It was DELICIOUS. It was sort of tart up front, the way a just-underripe cherry is, and had a very light cafe-au-lait flavor and texture at the back. It was smooth and delicious. /he also got a taste of the Thirsty Dog Stud Service Stoud, probably because it had the silliest name on the menu. It was lightly bodied, tasted of burnt coffee with a clean finish. Smooth, but not what I wanted. I blame it on the fact of it being a stout.

For our second round, TheIrish acquired a beer called the MAXIMATOR. Because when there is a beer with a name like MAXIMATOR someone has to try it. Here is what my notes say about that:
"Holy fuck spices. Holy crap let me wash out my mouth now jesus why did I drink that there can be no loving god in a universe where there is this beer." It was not very good.

I got the Reider Pilsner this time, which was the strangest thing I ever tasted. It was clean and bubbly the way I like it, but it had this strange vegetable aftertaste... like peas and asparagus. The boys didn't believe me, but when Irish drank some he immediately sputtered: "IT'S HEALTH BEER!" It was, too.

BeerSnob's second round was a glass of Hitachino Redrice, a rice beer, and he wished it hadn't been. This was all about fruit. It was apricots and cinnamon and ginger all over the place. We all agreed that this would be a FABULOUS beer to cook with, but it was not a pleasant pint.

Much later in the week I had a couple glasses of unexceptional pinot grigio. They were both clean and tart, though one had a bitter hint of lemon rind that I didn't like all that much. Pinot Grigio is wine for people who don't like wine very much, or so says the guy who orders the wine for our restaurant. But it's a fabulous wine to sip while writing, because the gentle flavor doesn't distract you!

I have also set up a bunch of infusions in a series of one and a half liter bell-jars that I bought for the purpose. The reason there are no pictures up or descriptions is that they are all to become Christmas presents and I don't want to ruin the surprise, so there.

And now I'm going to go back to writing my terrible urban fantasy. Rock on y'all.

On coffee.

It doesn't technically come in a bottle, but it totally could if you wanted it to. While I drink wine often and beer occasionally, I drink coffee or tea every day.

My first job was at a coffee shop. I worked weekends for a handfull of dollars an hour. Before then I didn't drink coffee. It was bitter and awful to me, but I loved the smell. Eventually waking up early on the weekends got the better of me and I realized that I needed a mild stimulant to keep me going.

I first started drinking coffee black, because I'm hardcore, right? Then I realized that it tasted like chewing on tree bark and just put milk and sugar in it. That was where the trouble all started. I began drinking coffee every morning, because it was delicious, and hey, when it's at home and at work it's free! Badass!

Eventually I started developing a really awesome condition where my heart would shudder in my chest. It wouldn't skip beats or do that fun thing where the ventricles get overcharged and contract twice in a row, it beat totally normally, but shivered while doing so. It was an intensely distressing feeling, I didn't know what was going on until I described it to my mom and she said that a coworker of hers had something similar, and it went away when he stopped drinking caffiene.

Oh. God damn it.

My friends did not understand why I switched to decaf. Why drink coffee at all when you're not getting the psychoactive effects? Because it's delicious, you bastards. Coffee is just flat out good. Of course, the fact that it's a stimulant is also pretty cool, and in college I returned to regular coffee.

That's basically all just a lot of backstory for this statement: Starbucks coffee is awful. It is the weakest. It is no good. They have excellent espresso, don't get me wrong, and if you're looking for some vaguely homosexual icey chocolate concoction then Starbucks is your man. However, if you just want a damn cup of coffee... damn they're bad.

So what does that have to do with the price of feet, Stark? Well, it's seriously interfering in my thought processes. I like to write and relax in the Barnes and Noble coffee shop and I feel vaguely guilty about doing this without buying something, so I always get one of those apple purses and some form of coffee after I get at least 1500 words down (Yes, I am attempting to condition myself to write more. Yes, this makes me a huge nerd. Yes, it's totally working.). Yesterday I got a vanilla latte, which are usually pretty good. It's hard to screw up espresso + milk + syrup. Today, however, I have a cafe au lait.

This thing is a disgrace. Instead of being rich, milky coffee, it is apparently just milk and bitter flavor. What the hell, Starbucks? What the hell?

Back in college I used to get three shots of espresso and doctor it like coffee. It was pretty damn delicious, but holy christ I think I may have gone tachycardic if I kept doing that shit.

In other news, tonight myself, BeerSnob and Kaiser TNT (because he looks like Napoleon Dynamite) are going to Max's Tap House for beers. TheIrish may join us, but we do not know. I will update again tomorrow about  the delicious beers I try.

Halloween!

I love Halloween. It's just a fun time of year. Candy, pumpkins, costumes... and an excellent excuse to drink too much.

On the night of the 30'th I got a group of friends together for a liqueur tasting and some spicy pumpkin soup. Almost everyone had a similar reaction to the liqueurs: the raspberry was the best, followed by the pomagranite, followed by the ginger vodka. Nobody liked the apple caramel, and the strawberry was unspectacular. Boyfriend liked the ginger vodka the best, though, and refused to have anything to do with the apple caramel, while BeerSnob tasted a few things, made faces, and ate all my goat cheese. Bastard.

At my party, which was a complete success, the strawberry was the most popular, followed by GrogLass's limoncello, which I have yet to taste. I was busy keeping people from breaking things and drinking key lime cocktails. My recipe is as follows:

2 oz vanilla vodka
1/2 oz rose's lime or fresh lime juice or whatever you have handy. Limecello might also be good for bonus alcohol points.
1/2 oz frangelico
1 oz cream
shake over ice, strain into martini glass rimmed with crushed graham crackers. Lacking graham crackers, I usually rimmed it with cinnamon and sugar instead. It was quite tasty.

Yay tasty things! Anyway, I was surprised at the number of people who showed up, and the great costumes some of them had. GrogLass and BeerSnob were, respectively, a dinosaur and the meteorite that killed the dinosaurs. Boyfriend put together a remarkable Fidel Castro costume out of crap he brought from WalMart. My good friend Hootie McBoob was an extremely attractive gray devil, which only got more awesome when another good friend, I'll call him Mr. India, showed up in a business suit with horns and red facepaint. Apparently they used the same purple lipstick.

I had people bring booze with them, and in some cases this was extremely awesome. I mentioned GrogLass's limoncello earlier. We were concerned about the quality, because it did not age at all and she had left the pith on the lemon peels. This did not matter at all, because someone got the brilliant idea to mix it with ginger ale. It disappeared, mostly into Mr. India's stomach. Another friend, Thom the Bhomb, had the unfortunate idea to bring jello shots. Well, really it was a big bowl full of boozey jello with a bunch of spoons in it. Terrible idea. Far too attractive to the already drunk.

Today was the continued cleanup. I have a metric crapton (or do I mean crapliters?) of booze left over. Unfortunately some of that is Miller Lite. Oh well. It'll get drunk in the fullness of time.

Jazz and wine and halloween

So it's intensely weird to eat at a restaurant where you wait tables. You see your boss and coworkers out of the corner of your eye and you're all "oh dammit I forgot to polish the big wine glasses aga... wait... wait..."

Even so, tasty stuff. I had a decent glass of red and a really excellent white burgundy. I don't know if it was really 12.50 a glass excellent... but it was certainly delicious. Very smokey. The jazz band was pretty awesome too.

Tonight I clean more for the party. The fun part will be dragging the table for beer pong into the basement in such nasty weather. Then I must acquire Red Cups and ping pong balls. At some point I am going to carve a pumpkin. I have a scene planned out of the Slender Man sneaking up on an unsuspecting person on his creepy legs. I'm going to need to find the right pumpkin for it.

I am somewhat disappointed in myself that I never made the pumpkin pie liqueur... it would have taken ages and breaking down pumpkins is so time consuming... so of course I'm going to do it in Friday to make my spicy pumpkin and sweet potato soup. Because what *else* would I do?

Rheingau Riesling Rocks

Nothing makes you want to drink more than waiting tables. If the service industry does not turn one into a raging misanthrope, it certainly turns one into an alcoholic. I enjoy working large parties, because most of the time people are so busy chatting with each other that they forget if I screw something up. Unfortunately tonight I was the only waiter who spoke English reliably. The others spoke only French. I was the only native English speaker in the entire staff that night, actually. It's depressing. I can't imagine how it feels to be in an entire country like that, divided off by language all the time.

Actually I can. I grew up in Germany. I learned enough German to get by, but I could only actually make friends with the other Army brats. Still, what a beautiful place to grow up in! We lived in a small town by the Rhein in a red sandstone castle (not kidding) within walking distance of the vinyards. We used to run around the vines and generally irritate the vintners as kids. It was good times.

It is impossible to get Eltville whine in America. They don't export it. This is a sadness for everyone who loves sweet riesling or spaetlese wines. It's hard enough to find good Rheingau wines at all, most riesling seems to come from the Mosel valley or somewhere in heathen France. I updated about our last bottle of Rheingau riesling earlier in the blog and was unimpressed, but my mother managed to find a bottle of riesling from a vinyard only a few miles down the road from our village: Schloss Vollrads.

I am not normally a fan of sweet wines. I find that most rieslings taste either like honey or vinegar. This, however, is very tasty.

It has a faint, fall appley smell. It is a very sharp wine, light bodied and  almost feels like it's pinching your tongue. It tastes like apples that have been macerating in sugar. It is a very fall drink, it conjures up images of fires, blankets, and early snows. I am enjoying it.

This weekend should have been much more interesting in terms of bottles being opened. it was MetalChef's 21st birthday party, after all. I gave him a gift of the cinnamon-apple infusion (formerly the apple-botulism infusion) and we all had a bit of a taste. Wow it was good. I probably over-sweetened it, which is unfortunate 'cause I definitely don't have a record of how much simple syrup I actually used. The cinnamon aftertaste was strong, almost, but not quite, overpowering. I almost think I should have used a stronger tasting apple. I used a Fiji apple when I should have used Granny Smith. I hate eating Fiji apples though, while if there is a Granny Smith available I am probably already eating it.

Anyway, the big problem at that party was that I decided to layer a bottle of hard cider on top of questionable alfredo, which was itself layered on top of a knot of seething, unthinking rage. This is not a recipe for success, and I found myself quite unable to continue drinking after a bottle and a half of cider. What a shame.

On Saturday I had an overly sweet margarita sno-cone at the Greene Turtle in Ocean City with the Boyfriend after watching Zombieland, which was a surprisingly excellent movie.  There was an exceptional band playing there called Pompous Pie. They were not exceptional for their music, which was decent, rather for the volume at which it was played. For some reason the Greene Turtle on Rt. 611 feels that they need to provide music for the entire eastern shore, and turns up their speakers appropriately. I just want to have a terrible boat drink and chat, you bastards!

goddamn goons. goddamn slender man.

I make poor decisions. Today's poor decision was to read all the Slender Man stories on Something Awful. After watching the first few Marble Hornets episodes. I am now jumping at movement in my peripheral vision. Luckily I own a parrot, so screeching and giggling sounds are so standard in my life that I can't even notice. And so I turn to wine and terrible German pop to drive the distressing images out of my mind.

Last night I had a large party of people order a large quantity of red meat. They ordered three bottles of red and one bottle of white, and proceeded to drink all the red and half of the white, so I liberated the bottle. It is another white burgundy wine, I can't find the grape varietal, and it is tangy and tropical and kind of delightful for sitting open in my fridge overnight.

I also decanted the apple-caramel and the raspberry infusions. They both smell *amazing.* I flavored the raspberry with a metric crapton (about a half cup) of simple syrup and dropped some food coloring in there to turn it a beautiful, dark-dark red. I made knockoff chambord! Yay me! I have no idea how I am going to use this stuff at my party. I guess people can drink the apple-caramel stuff like a martini, maybe with a rim of cinnamon-sugar. I think I'll mix the raspberry stuff with the pama knockoff and add... something else, maybe just straight up pomegranate juice... and call it Persephone's Tears. Suggestions?

GREs

Okay first? To hell with the GREs. They are useless as tools to determine suitability for graduate study. I have an undergraduate degree, graduated cum laude, and completed an undergraduate thesis and a separate comprehensive exam, and to hell with you I don't need to retake the SATs to prove my academical worth!

But yeah I got a pretty good score so go me!

In other news, it's booze-buying week for the Halloween Shindig. My paycheck is pretty much going to determine what sorts/how much I am providing. I know that there will be beer and wine and probably some basic stuff like vodka, rum, and tequila... we shall see!

I am an idiot.

Okay so I read Uzumaki yesterday while eating spirals mac & cheese from a bowl with a spiral pattern on it, you know, for bonus points, and I found it far less frightening than either Gyo or Amigara Fault, both of which gave me distressing nightmares. I thought that I would be totally fine with everything. And then today I decided to eat a slice of portobello mushroom.

Now, I used to hate mushrooms. The texture is gross. I started eating them at work because they are vegetable matter and I don't eat enough vegetables. I grew to like them, even though they are kind of like eating slugs. I would think "mmm delicious balsamic slug nom nom nom" as I ate them.

While I was thinking this I recalled the part of Uzumaki where the gang member crawls inside the snail persons shell and starts eating his face raw. He comes out and describes it vividly before doing whatever weird spiral-possessed thing he did. I was immediately sick to my stomach and had to throw away the rest of the mushroom. Even holding it in my hand was disgusting to me.

So I guess what I'm trying to say here is SCREW YOU ITO JUNJI, YOU TWISTED BASTARD.

In other news I'm thinking of starting Rising Mind in a new blog, because that would be pretty cool, right?

WOOOO!!!

Oh christ on a crutch I just dropped over three hundred bucks on a plane ticket why did I do that oh god I am so very broke aaargleblargleblargle

But hey! Puerto Rico! It is where the rum has gone! I look forward to drinks made with three parts bacardi to one part coconut milk and pineapple. I also look forward to iguanas, because iguanas are awesome and, apparently, edible. I plan to cook one. Anyone know how to cook an iguana?

I'm getting ahead of myself.

So Boyfriend's family has this three bedroom apartment in Luquillo. I've been there once before and it was awesome, but I was much shyer at that point in my life, and missed out on some good times. THIS time, I am going in armed with a basic Spanish vocabulary picked up from the Hondurans at my restaurant. I shall also be going with an excellent cast of characters, such as BeerSnob, his girlfriend GrogLass, and Mr. Boyfriend's fraternity brother, Brosef. This promises to be an entertaining mix. There shall be scuba, snorkeling, swimming, and the dedicated swilling of rum.

This is going to be awesome. I can't wait.

In considerably less interesting news, I'm slowly making my way through a bottle of Ferngrove Symbols this week. It's a Viognier/Shiraz blend and it basically tastes like red wine. It has some pleasant nuttiness to it, and a clean aftertaste, but those are masked by astringent alcohol vapors. Drinkable, but not the kind of wine you drink a large quantity of at once.

Edit: OH SHIT I JUST MADE A KEY LIME COCKTAIL

It is similar to the recipe below, except it involves frangelico instead of midori and like double the unsweetened lime juice. VERY TASTY

Drink Recipes! Hooray!

Yeah, I don't have a title for today.

I had every intention of having this post be all about my original psychoactive drink of choice: coffee. Unfortunately my attention waned at the restaurant today when I was told to bring out a plate of mushroom compote crepes with foie gras and carmelized pears to my boss. Oh god, the smell was so heavenly... I love foie gras. It is cruel but delicious. I get it maybe once a year, twice if I'm lucky. This is for the best, since too much of it would likely make me gras myself.

I was also told of an Amish market that opened up in Laurel that I shall have to visit. Tim the Fabulous recommended it to me. I need to get some pumpkins and some good spices for my next infusion, as well as maybe some fatty goose liver to satisfy these new cravings. Of course, I'd have to take a dollar over to the candy counter and get a metric crapton of candy like I used to do when I was little.

Speaking of candy, it must be near to Halloween because the air just smells like candy. Two days ago it smelled like peanut butter cups. Then it smelled like hersheys. Best. Synaesthetic experience. Ever.

In booze news, I found a cocktail recipe on Something Awful (I lurk) that I MUST share. In fact, I may be forced to edit this post as I read through the cocktail thread there, so that I can keep all of my favorite ideas together.

Key Lime Cocktail
2 parts vanilla vodka
1 part Midori or other melon flavored liqour
1.5 part heavy cream
1 part roses lime


Place all ingredients in a shaker and shake like hell. You want to incorporate enough air into it so that it becomes creamy, and whips the cream. Pour into a martini glass that is rimmed with crushed graham cracker.

I had a simplified version of this at the rumor mill as just a shot. This sounds badass. I have a bottle of cheap melon liqueur in my car that I may have to open. Though it's two years old and has spent much of its life in my trunk... it's probably gross now.

Purple Haze Martini
2oz Stoli Raz
1/2 Blue Curacao
splash of cranberry juice.

Shake and strain Blue Curacao and vodka with plenty of ice into a martini glass. Sink the cranberry juice into the bottom of the glass.
 
Hot damn this one sounds good. Also very pretty! I should make more raspberry liqueur before making this though, 'cause that'll be cheaper.

And the drink with the most excellent name is...
Alien Orgasm
2/3oz Amaretto
2/3oz Midori
2/3oz Peach Schnapps
Fill rest with 1/2 orange juice, 1/2 pineapple juice 

Apparently I'm all about Midori today with the drinks I'm selecting.